About Me

My Photo
Texas
Wife to B, Mama to Jack & Ryan. Lover, fighter, baker, mermaid, pretend CSI and obsessed with all things pretty.

The hubs.

The hubs.
Brannan, also known as B, B$ or big sexy.

Jack!

Jack!
lover, cuddler, animal whisperer.

Ryan!

Ryan!
Troublemaker, giggler, puzzle whiz.

Monday, June 16, 2014

summer feet.

Summer is here! There is no excuse for gross feet. You can skate by in winter but it's sandal weather, time to take care of your tootsies. 

"But Angel, I don't had time for a pedicure! What Do I do?!"

Well, I'll tell you what to do.

 Freeman Beauty Spa professional. I was contacted by influenster to review this product and am so glad I did. After finally tracking it down at WalMart, I made a spa night of it on Saturday. 


First Impressions:

The packaging is so upscale compared to their other products!

I love the color! I know that's silly, but oh well. Such a pretty mermaid blue. 

I was surprised by the consistency. I thought it would be more of a scrub. (this could also be because I don't know my beauty terms.) It was more like soap with a little bit of sand mixed in.

The smell. Nope. Not liking it. It smells like chemically, hair conditioner with a floral(?) coverup. Not the business. 

I tried to take a cute artsy picture and my smiley face looks like  serial killer.


Usage:

It's easy to use, rub all over your feet, rinse off.  Use twice weekly, or as needed.

The Verdict:

The jury is out. I'm not crazy about the smell, but my feet are soft. I don't feel like this product would take the place of a pedicure, but it's good for in between trips to the nail salon. I'll keep using and update when the bottle is empty. 

Happy Monday! Let's make it a great week!




Friday, June 13, 2014

We made it!

Hallelujah! It's Friday! I'm so happy to see you!

Don't you judge me!

Once again I'll be linking up with Leslie.




I confess if I don't get my feet in these boots IMMEDIATELY! I'll die!

I'm not really a shoe gal anymore but these speak to my heart!

I confess VBS starts next week and I could not be more thrilled! I wish it lasted all summer. 

I confess I have nothing planned for Fathers Day. Other than to curb the bitch attitude and let him think he's right all day long. 

I confess my parents are in California and I am so jealous! We moved a year ago and I'm so homesick.

I confess I haven't shaved my legs in a week and possibly scared all the other moms at the pool. Don't worry, I'm shaving tonight. (spiky legs are my favorite form of birth control)

Happy Friday! I hope ya'll have the best weekend! Don't forget to follow me on Instagram & Twitter!






Thursday, June 12, 2014

one year.

One year ago today, my mom's best friend picked up me, my mom and the boys and drove us to the airport. Weeks prior to this moment, I had packed up our entire life. Clothes, toys, kitchen wares. The house we lived in was my grandparents. They bought the house in 1950. No one but our family had lived there. Until now. Now a new family would be moving in and making memories. A new family would decorate, plant their own garden and ignore my tiny handprints in the cement outside by the hose. Would they be happy? Would they be kind to one another?


I cried twice while packing. Not because I was moving, but because I was leaving my home. 617 Hemlock was my safe place. It's where I grew up. Where my boys grew up. All my childhood memories took place in the house. 

B, the boys and I lived downstairs. My brother lived upstairs. We've lived together my whole life. The thought of him being more than a yell away, broke my heart. 

I spent a few weeks packing up our home while it was getting a much needed face lift, new carpet and paint, new kitchen. Then we moved in with my mom for a month so Jack could finish school.

B had left a few days before to drive the truck out with his guns, mom flew out with us so she could house hunt with my dad. I put our carry ons in the car and lost my shit on the front porch. My best friend had come by multiple times to say goodbye and cry with me and because I have a heart made of stone, I didn't cry. Not.One.Tear. #restingbitchface

But here I was on my porch sobbing uncontrollably. Every feeling I'd been ignoring or putting aside, came to surface. How in the world would I, a flower child, survive in Texas? How would I survive without Karl the fog? Would people be nice? Would I get lost? How far is the beach or a mountain?

I cried the entire way to the airport, I cried checking our bags when jerk face mcgee told me my bag was 4lbs over and he was going to charge me $100! I cried when the burger king line was super long and the kids started whining. I cried when they gave away our seats on the plane and tried to put Jack a few rows ahead of me. I cried when the sweet last sitting next to us hopped right out of her seat and switched with Jack, no questions asked. 

During take off I looked at Sign Hill one last time.


I prayed and cried the whole way that we had made the right choice. That we would be happy in Texas. I cried the whole car ride to my Mother in Laws. I didn't know where I was. I didn't know the highways. I didn't know the stores. I didn't understand why the churches were bigger than Target. The next day I went to Walmart and got lost 3 times on the way home. In our first week I had a panic attack when it started raining and hailing, I thought for sure it was a tornado. 

It's been a year and I know my way around better. I finally made some friends. No one I could call crying, but still. I'm hoping to travel more out of the DFW area within the next year. I'm dying to go to Austin.

It's been an interesting year. Buying a home and getting our footing. Seeing the boys play in their backyard, lets me know we made the right choice.








rainy day.

I've had this post open all day. Not sure what I want to write about. It's 70 outside with rain(yay!) and thunderstorms. Were having a lazy day. We can't swim because of the weather, everyone and their mother will be at the indoor playgrounds and I'm in no mood to clean up mud, so there will be no puddle jumping. Instead there's lots of Legos and cartoons. #momfail

I've been researching budgets and cheap meals all morning. I've come to the conclusion that chicken will be eaten at every meal and my hopes and dreams of going organic will be put on hold indefinitely. I've beaten 3 levels of candy crush and am attempting to watch Penny Dreadful. I love Eva Green. She is perfection. I love horror movies/shows. It's just difficult to watch when the kids are around. They don't need to see the vampire lair. I didn't need to see the vampire lair.

I'm hoping once B gets home to sneak out. Not sure to where. Maybe Kroger. Probably Walmart or Target. I'm sure we need something :)

I think it's time I got up and was productive. I'll have more exciting posts coming this week up. A product review and a recap of our first year in Texas.

I hope ya'll had a great day and thank you for sticking with me :)

Monday, June 9, 2014

Summer is here!

Hi all! I hope you had a wonderful weekend! School got out on Friday and we spent about 5 hours at the pool for a sweet friends birthday party. The kids had a blast. I got to meet some new mommy friends. After bath time, they were all asleep within 5 minutes! Too bad I was to exhausted to do anything but eat a pop tart and watch reruns of Parks & Rec. #treatyoself

Saturday the boys got haircuts, thanks to Uncle Brian. I should have taken pictures but I'm so attached to their hair. I just hid inside. If I had my way, there hair would never be cut and they'd all look like little Willie Nelson's. We ended up at my moms pool, because going in a pool that 100 kids swam in yesterday is no bueno. (seriously ask me how many time I saw a kid use the bathroom? gross.) Grandma came over after dinner time and left with all 3 kiddos. We watched Grudge Match. It was pretty good. I wouldn't pay to see it in theaters but still funny.

Sunday was a lazy day. I slept in until 10AM! It was so beautiful I didn't want it to end. So later that afternoon I took a nap. We bbqed burgers for dinner and watched Ninjagos. Later that night I stayed up way past my bedtime, talking with my oldest and dearest friend Danielle.


Costume party 2005!

It's been so hard to get anyone from California on the phone for more than 5 minutes. When I'm up for the day, everyone in CA is just waking up, and when they're winding down from dinner and getting off work, I'm in bed. AGH!!!!

Today I'm hosting a playmate for about 20 children. However, theres is a HUGE thunderstorm going on since last night. I've never heard anything like it! The good news is it's raining! Were in the middle of a stage 3 drought, the rain is much needed. We'll be making Father's Day presents today!

             
How cute are these?! I should probably be cleaning, but I'm trying to watch Dr.Who (I'm so lost!) and the kids are still asleep. Awwwww peace :)

How was your weekend? What did you do? 

Friday, June 6, 2014

FRIDAY!



Happy Friday! We made it! Today I'm linking up with one of my favorite bloggers, Leslie!

I confess:
I'm absolutely terrified of summer! I have no idea how I'm going to entertain 3 children, all.day.long. without breaking the bank or joining AA in August. HELP!!!

I may or may not have cried at Jack's end of year assembly. The 5th grade boys in SPED did a dance to One Direction "You don't know you're beautiful", (which by the way at the very beginning sounds an awful lot like "Summer Lovin" from Grease.) It was so sweet and they looked so cute in there shirts and ties. 

I lied to my hairdresser about why I couldn't make my appointment this Saturday. I'm just not good at telling people I'm not happy with their work. I'm planning on chopping a good chunk of hair off and don't want to do it with someone I don't trust. I'm hoping the haircut will make me look like her. #girlcrush


I think thats all for now, I hope ya'll had a great week and even better weekend!
What are your plans?




Wednesday, June 4, 2014

I don't want to be fat anymore.

I'm fat. Not curvy. Not plump. Not chubby. Fat. 

I've always been curvy. I gained about 50lbs with Jack and had lost almost all of it when I got pregnant with Ryan. Seeing how hard it was to lose the weight the first time you'd think I would watch what I ate. Nope. I ate like shit. Wendy's for breakfast. McDonalds for dinner. I ate horribly and at 37 weeks I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I started to eat right and the weight melted off. Seriously like 4 lbs in a week. Ryan came and I did pretty good with my eating. I snacked alot to keep up my milk supply(It never came in, but that's a post for another day) I drank lots of water, I stayed away from crappy foods because I knew it would effect my milk. Once my maternity leave ended, I took Jack out of preschool and became a full time SAHM. And became depressed. I have never been diagnosed with depression but that's the only thing I can think of to call it. I was so sad. I didn't want to get out of bed. I didn't want to shower, or get dressed. A messy frizzy bun and yoga pants became my comfort. Chips and dip became my best friend. I would cry when the boys weren't around. I felt like such a failure. I wanted to be a good role model for them, I wanted to take them to the park or beach. Teach them how to ride a bike or throw a ball and instead I turned into a fat slob who laid in bed all day watching CSI eating candy under the covers. 

I felt so alone during my pregnancy and now that I was home all the time it only got worse. I had lost alot of friends and not being in the working world interacting with people really took it's toll on me. I defiantly withdrew as well. I was so ashamed of my appearance I didn't want people to see me. I was scared I would run into friends from high school and get whispered about. 

Things got better last summer, I started working for an organic produce delivery company. It felt good to get out of the house and be productive. I worked graveyard and it became to hard to keep up with the boys during the day when I was working 8+ hours at night. Sadly I quit. I miss working there, everyone was so nice, it was a great company. :(

Jack started school in September and I made friends with the other moms. One in particular, Angela, her boys are the same age as mine. She's such an inspiration. She's such an earth mama. She really believes in what she feeds her boys. No gluten, no food dyes. We ate at her house for dinner one night and she made spanish rice. She makes her own tomato paste! I was so impressed. She has a beautiful garden in her backyard. Tons of fruit trees, even grapes!

During my sad time I stopped cooking. I love to cook. I love to plan a meal and prep for it and cook it up. I like to pretend I'm Julia Child or Ina Garten when I cook. I'm slowly getting back into cooking. Since our move we've pledged no more fast food. Were only going to eat out when it's a special occasion, a birthday or date night. I never realized how much I depend on McDonalds, I feel like a crack addict. I know fast food is killing me yet I crave it. 

Since our move we've eaten out more than I care to admit. It's hard because I get bored and want to take the kids out which leads to eating lunch out or getting a snack at Sonic in the afternoon. Damn you half priced diet coke with cherry! 

I feel like I'll do really good for a few days and then the weekend will come or I'll have a bad day and before I know it, it's 1am and I've eaten and entire container of cream cheese with a whole bag of hot cheetos.

I am no nutritionist. I'm not an expert at anything health/weight loss related. I'm just taking it one step at a time. I joined a gym at the moment and am looking forward to getting active again. I've started walking at night after dinner. I'll walk for about an hour almost 3 miles. I've also started drinking more water. The only downside to that is that I'm peeing every 5 minutes.

Before Pictures:





It's funny how you don't really see yourself. I never ever thought I looked this bad. In my head I'm a size 12, until I get in the dressing room and the XL doesn't fit. It's close to a billion degrees outside. I want to wear tank tops and cute dresses. Bat wings and thighs that rub are not the business. I've untagged myself from so many pictures on FB and asked people not to post pictures. I'm so sad and angry with myself that I've let myself get this big. It's time for a change. Check back weekly to see my progress and what I'm doing to get healthy. I turn 30 in a year and a half. All I want is to not wear shape wear on the big day.